Kid Friendly Mansion of Moderate Creep Levels, Saturday Morning

[justlurkinghere]

The house Derek woke up this time wasn't as dilapidated or creepy as the last one. Which was a definite plus.

And there was still the puff ball dog! Another plus.

The biggest plus, however? Fully stocked fridge.

So, with the puff ball dog tucked carefully into one of the flannel shirts he'd found upstairs, Derek was digging through the stuff to make himself a sandwich. Sorry about stealing all the lunch meat, Mike.

[[Open, of course!]]

Comments

[robinonadderall]

"Positive." So very positive. "So what are your plans for the day after eating said sandwich and doing my laundry?"

[justlurkinghere]

"I'm not doing your laundry," Derek replied, rolling his eyes in wee-tiny exasperation. It was a Hale trait. It just was.

[robinonadderall]

"Yes you are." Either now or when you're an adult, it was gonna happen, Derek. "And hey, did you stumble across a red hoodie when you were going through my clothes?"

The red hoodie that had been held hostage for months now.

[justlurkinghere]

"...no?" Yes, he had.

[robinonadderall]

Derek, you were a terrible liar as a child. Just terrible. "Are you sure?"

[justlurkinghere]

HE WAS AN AMAZING LIAR. HUMANS SHOULDN'T KNOW HOW TO READ HIM SO WELL.

UGH.

"It was in the closet," he said with a sigh.

[robinonadderall]

"But where in the closet?" He had looked before and found nothing!

[justlurkinghere]

Siiiiigh.

"In the back," Derek replied like Stiles was just being dumb now. "Under a smelly box."

[robinonadderall]

"There's a smelly box?" On one hand, Stiles should probably respect Derek's privacy. On the other, he wanted his hoodie. "Okay, you have to show me where this is. I'm intrigued."

[justlurkinghere]

There was always a smelly box.

Derek sighed, giving his mostly demolished 'sandwich' a look before shoving some more into his mouth. Only then did he grab hold of Stiles' wrist to drag him along behind him upstairs.

How did you survive without his help, Stiles? How?

[robinonadderall]

Ugh, Stiles had mustard on his wrist, he just knew it. But he went along with Derek without bitching. He asked, after all. "Why did you lie about the hoodie in the first place?"

[justlurkinghere]

"Because if I hid it, it was for a reason," Derek grumbled, only letting go of Stiles once he got the closet door open. And then there was crawling on in under the disturbing number of leather jackets and henleys hanging up in there to get to it.

The box dubbed smelly was shoved out as well to get it out of the way as he pulled the hoodie out.

And maybe sniff at it a little. "It smells like it belongs to me."

[robinonadderall]

"You probably hid it to be a jerk." Because thinking differently would make Stiles' head explode. "No wonder it smells like it belongs to you, it's under all your stuff. I'll just wear it and it'll smell like me again."

He was resolutely ignoring the box. He just wanted to see if it existed and it did so he was going to leave it at that. Opening it would be an invasion of privacy and he could respect that. Goddammit.

[justlurkinghere]

Derek would respect no such things, pulling the hoodie on and probably getting it all mustardy. But that is what happens when you let a kid take charge of the situation, Stiles.

That right there.

He fiddled with the latch, frowning in extreme concentration as he grew a claw to force it open. "What are they?"

[robinonadderall]

Derek, you were a little shit, that was what you were. It was his hoodie goddammit! Derek's of all ages needed to learn this!

"What's what," Stiles said, shoulder checking Derek so he could get a better look at the box. And immediately he wish he didn't. "Ohhhhhhhhhh my fucking god."

[justlurkinghere]

"Hey! You're not supposed to swear around kids." Yeah, he was that kid.

[robinonadderall]

"Trust me, this occasion calls for it!" Stiles said, slapping his hands over his own eyes. Really, that was just a stupid thing to do considering he should probably be putting his hands over the kid's eyes to keep him from looking upon the box of sex toys.

Oh god Derek owned sex toys. More than one. He didn't even know what to do with this information! This was terrible and kind of hot but also terrible because he couldn't think about how hot that was right now!

[justlurkinghere]

"What? Why?" EXPLAIN IT SO THAT DEREK CAN HIDE FOREVER ON MONDAY.

[robinonadderall]

"Because--because you shouldn't have opened that!" Stiles said, still keeping his eyes covered. "Those are private things that are for adults and oh my god close the box. Close it right now."

[justlurkinghere]

"You're the adult!" Oh, Derek.

But he shut the box and shoved it at Stiles' chest like he could fix this.

[robinonadderall]

Stiles had no choice but to grab on to whatever Derek was shoving at him and he made a squeaking noise when he realized what it was. "No, no don't give it to me! It's yours! I mean, not--I mean older you!"

[justlurkinghere]

Derek sighed, shoving himself up to abandon Stiles with the box of confusion. "I want to play video games. I'm going to play and you're going to be weird."

[robinonadderall]

"You're weird!" Stiles shot back. "And give me my hoodie back!"

Stiles looked down at the box in his arms and quickly went to put it back where thought it might have been. But not before opening it up again to get a closer look. "Oh my god how many vibrating settings do you need?"

Well now he was kind of jealous. He couldn't get that stuff until he was eighteen.

[justlurkinghere]

A LOT, STILES. HE NEEDED A LOT.

"Who are you talking to?" Derek shouted from the stairs. Because werewolf hearing.

The hoodie was his. Deal with it.

[robinonadderall]

"Nobody!" Stiles shoved the box into the back of the closet and willed himself to not think about it. Until later. When he was alone.

Then he scrambled downstairs. "We're never speaking of that again, understood?"